So this day was very, very hard for me. Soon you will see why, just read this post. :)
Journal Entry:
July 5, 2012
"This day was so overwhemling in so many ways. It was good to get back into visiting schools and seeing the children we visited when we went to the CDC school, which was up in the mountains straight across town and away from where we stayed. It was a different area than we had ever seen and very hard to see. All the houses that surrounded the school were practically hole-in-the-walls. When we arrived at the CDC school, we were immediately given a tour. We visited classrooms and some of the children gave little presentations or wanted to pray for our team, which was amazing and so sweet to hear. We eventually made it down to the main courtyard area where some of the groups of kids gave us dance routines as a form of welcoming us to the school. After the kids gave their amazing dances and stuff, we were split into two groups. One group traveled on our first round of home visits in the houses near by and the other group stayed to lead worship and then share the message with the students there. I stayed with the group who lead worship. Jair, one of our amazing singers on our mission trip, lead us in worship and some of us went up and did hand motions for the songs. Then we all sat with the kids on the ground or in chairs and listened to another fellow friend from our mission trip, Oscar, who shared the Message with the students. It was a good time of worship and spreading the Word of God. We did two groups of children like this, then our group went to eat lunch and wait for the other group to get back.
Well, I kind of left some things out as I told about the morning. You know how I mentioned taking a tour of the classes before the students gave the presentations in the big courtyard area? Well, guess what the first classroom we walked into? A Special Education classroom! And guess what? I walked into the classroom and was standing there watching the students work and I nearly had a feak out, because God talked to me! He said One Word! - OKAY! I was in utter shock!! I was like wait, what?? God!
People suggested that I could stay in the classroom till the end of the day. I said, NO!!! I had to get out of there! I was so overwhelmed by what the Lord was saying in that one word! So, when we went to lunch, I kind of lost some of my composure and started freaking out to the people around me and told them what I had heard from the Lord. There was much discussion and it was finally decided that I would need to go through the 15 days to 3 months long praying and waiting to make sure that what I heard was truly God and not an emotional response from the emotional stress of the week. But, I finally got an answer from the Lord after waiting a year and a half to hear from him. Praise the Lord.
Some other factors that I realized during lunch = God had given some indications during the week that I had overlooked until this day.
1. God has given me one indication through family - I have always gotten extremely homesick when I am away from home, but I did not truly miss them this past trip. In fact, now that I have left Colombia, I am homesick to go back; leaving was awful and I wish I could go back there sooner than later.
2. Ever since Jace, my nephew, had died, I have not wanted to be separated from the family. It has been hard to go on trips; terrifying at times that I will lose a family member while I was away. But, I was okay with being gone this past week. I was not worried, and God had given me confidence that everything would be okay, that the family was in His hands and that I needed to stop worrying. So, this is what happened that nearly knocked my socks off that day, but the day was only half over at this point! There is so much still to go!
So, anyways, back to the rest of the day. After we had lunch, the group I was with went on house calls while the other group stayed at the school and did crafts and worship with another group of students. We went on two home visits. It was so hard, but amazing to see how these people are living in hole-in-the wall houses, but they are so happy and content. I began to wonder what was wrong with America. Some of us have 100 times more than those people, but we are still not happy with what we have, how we look, where we go, what kind of job we have, etc. It was painful to see what kind of conditions all these people lived in, but they had made homes and kept them clean as much as they could. It was so humbling to see and talk with them and share in the joy that they have every day. The people we visited in the two homes had lived in their homes for 15-20 years. It was an incredible experience. After we did home visits, we went back to the afterschool program to pick up the rest of the crew. We finally left and headed home, but had to say goodbye to one of our fellow mission trip members, Jair. He was leaving to go back home to be with his family. And thus, begins the day that we have to say goodbye to one of our team members each of the following days."
That day was a hard and long, and as you can tell, a shock as well. But, the pull to stay in Colombia just got stronger as the week began to end and I began to realize that Colombia seemed to be the place that God was truly calling me to. I am still in prayer, but the calling is still strong. We shall see what the next couple of weeks and months will be like.
Please keep me in your prayers as I begin to pray and understand where God is calling me to go and what I will be doing in my future.
Until next time!
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